The Silver Tear

Posted On August 1, 2019

You are seen. Noticed. Watched.

What the eye captures, pulls your image in and translates that info into the mind and soul of the watcher. Sometimes, that one visual moment sears a permanent place into the memory, making you unforgettable.

I never expected the life-altering possibility of such a glance. A heart unraveled, wounded to be healed again.

We stood in the foyer (church yet again) waiting for other family members to join us. My newborn son slept, snuggled against my chest, his fist grasping the fabric of my dress. Black against white. Sweet slumber in the slowly growing noise.

An older gentleman approached us. He’d been weeping. A tear lingered in his voice, on his cheek. “I didn’t know…” He swallowed. “I didn’t know how much of a racist I was until this morning.”

Racist? Red flag. Maybe we needed to leave.

“But I’m not anymore. I’m not a racist anymore.” He gulped. “Seeing you together like that…It’s gone.”

He reached for my son, his hand hovering my baby’s back. As if to come close something holy. Or Someone holy. I believe he was. A person can’t walk with God and remain a racist, can they?

I’m weeping as I write this memory, dear readers. There’s no greater humility than coming before God and man, and admitting to a great wrong. He captures the grief of it and pours on grace. Sacred shame, sacred change.

I hate the very word for racism. And the gut-twisting history, past and present, surrounding this topic. As a matter of fact, I’d advise any of you to stay away from all racists. Even if they are family members. Your kids never need to be around them. (So much to talk about on that one.)

But we don’t always get to choose, do we? This man, though. If I had known, I would have walked the other direction. Excused myself from the building faster than a chick-on-fire. I’m glad we don’t wear neon signs or labels for all to read and judge by.

The man’s sight cleared his blindness–and he could see deeper into the heart of his Creator. I wonder what else he saw…